Ugh. Exams are going a lot worse this time around. I don't know what it is- less confidence in the topics/products, more confident in the exam process, more products, being less emotionally invested- or a combination of all of those- but I feel terrible about these exams.
Today was worse than yesterday. It started out rough- I forgot to do the base temperature for my bread, but didn't realize it until it was mixed and resting. My partner proceeded with hers and I needed to get some mini tart shells done- had to put bread off another 45 minutes. The tart dough was giving me hell and the temperature in our classroom was climbing. My financiers were crowded in the middle of a flexipan and didn't bake evenly or get the color they needed (=points off). I forgot a small, yet important detail when sheeting my croissant dough and it turned into a blob. This made my croissants look a little lopsided. At the end of the day, my large tart dough was either so soft that I couldn't pick it up or so hard it was cracking. I was so frustrated with myself all day for making so many mistakes. I still am frustrated, but what can I do? Like Chef JP said, it's better that we bomb at school than in a real job. This is the time to make mistakes. I just have a hard time with not doing my best.
The one thing that went well is I got my salambos done. I piped my pate a choux yesterday, so today I made some very smooth pastry cream and good dry caramel, both of which helped the final product. I am still concerned that my pate a choux weren't perfectly piped, but I stuck to my gut and didn't remake them. I turned them in and I noticed that the chefs ate at least 2! That's a good sign, right? I've had a couple myself and will have a few more in a bit.
Tomorrow should, er- will, be better. I have less to finish up, so I can spend more time doing what I need to do, which will hopefully result in good products. I need to make my plan for tomorrow and get some sleep. I hope that tomorrow goes better than the last two days, but more than that, I just want tomorrow to be over. I'm sticking around Chicago this weekend and have lots of things I want to accomplish/experience. *BIG sigh* Thanks for tuning in. I hope to post more about what's been happening for the last couple of weeks.
